A Wonderful Thing

One of the most wonderful things a parent ever achieves is having a conversation with their child that shows their growth, maturity and yes independence.

I was speaking with Blond Girl today and felt such pride, such joy in her. I was astounded at her wisdom, her voice. She is turning into a fantastic young woman.

I shared with her something I wrote on shaunispeaks and she articulated in a non judgmental way that said, I see your point but I don't agree.. It was beautifully done. Then as our conversation continued and she saw my response to what others said and how I was choosing to handle it, she complimented me. Still not ever agreeing with me, just never condemning. If she can take that gift into the  world with her she will have an amazing life!

I found myself listening to her opinion and advice while I was able to offer her some as well. A true conversation with another woman.. yeah made me tear up a bit. I am so very proud of her

Poor Jon and Kate

yes that is sarcasm... sorry but our actions have consequnces..when we decide to put our lives on public display we can't complain when the public intervenes. There is a difference between say being an actor or singer and demanding that our children received the privacy they deserve but when they put their children on display and make money from being a family then complain cuz now you are being exploited... grow up!!

Of course poor jon and kate reminds me of a story from when my children were little...

I diligently did mom and me with each of my kids making sure they had that time with me. When Blond Girl was a baby (still in the infant seat) I attended said classes with Word Girl. Of course I dragged blond girl to classes with us. Hair Boy was in kindergarten and Pita Boy was in preschool so my time had to be very scheduled. There was this family of triplets that came to the meetings and along with mom came grandma, grandpa, uncle louie, aunt marie, etc, etc.. I swear they brought every single extended family member they could.

One day Word Girl had picked her spot she wanted to sit (no one was there as of yet) she placed her craft there and went to get the rest of her stuff.. Sure enough along came this family and MOVED my child.. she was in tears when I confronted the mother and yes I confronted her.. Her answer was well I have triplets and it is so hard... whine whine whine.. and we need to stay together... I need all the help.. I just about came apart.. Here I was alone, with an infant, an 2 yr old, a 4 year old in preschool who had to be picked up and gotten home fed and ready for his afternoon bus pick up and a 6 year old who would be coming home from school. My mornings were scheduled to the minute.. I must admit I raised my voice..

Sorry Lady, yes you have three kids but every friggin member of your family is here to help.. I have to be in three places at the exact same time, have FOUR kids and no one I repeat no one is helping me.. so granny can get off her fat ass and let my daughter have her spot..

For some reason they never came back...

giggles really I am a reasonable and patient person....

So Not Getting into the Middle of This

So Blond Girl comes home tonight from singing at church services and Word Girl is off Volunteering at the Children's Museum. To most this would seem an ideal situation one child giving her voice to God and another serving her community. How could this ever be turned???

First words out of Blond Girl's mouth... MOM, can you please explain to Word Girl that just because she got a haircut it does not mean her hair is thicker?

Me... Hon, I am not going to get involved in this..

Blond Girl.. Well everyone knows it makes it FULLER, not thicker...

Me... Hon, I am not going to get involved in this...

Blond Girl... Your hair remains the same thickness no matter how it is cut the strands on your head do not change....

Me... Hon, I am not going to get involved in this...

Blond Girl... Why not I am right!! You know it!!! You just never let me win!! (goes into the bathroom in a huff)

Me (to Hair Boy and Pita Boy) what would you get involved in it???

Hair Boy (who has the thickest most gorgeous hair in the world).. Mom, why does it even matter???

Blond Girl (from the bathroom) yeah what would YOU know.. and sure take her side...

So maybe I should have agreed with her but some fights we don't need to have and since winning a fight with Word Girl is something of an impossibility... and was this battle really that important??

Oh, Ain't Life Grand???

When Will I Ever Learn?

So on Saturday night I went out to dinner with the ex and the kids it was a pleasant enough dinner and I as usual tried to overlook the ex's overbearing personality but here it is 2 days later and the repercussions are still coming in.

I guess I had forgotten about the way he is always right.. Pita Boy has ADHD we have worked for years on dealing with it without medication, proper eating, sleep and structure habits. We have created a format that works relatively well. Then one dinner and poof suddenly my son decides he doesn't have ADHD so he doesn't need to follow them.

We had discussed the navy which I strongly believe will be a wonderful choice for him.. provide structure, reward and set limits with stated repercussions and give him a chance to do something until he figures out what he wants to do.. and yet again the ex shot that down.. ONE DAMN DINNER...

Sighs I am a bit angry as this man has been what we like to term an absentee father and I have done all the work raising the kids yet he persists in deciding that he knows what is best for them. I could go on but I just needed to get this out.

Watching Hair Boy at Work

Hair Boy has what has to be considered one of the coolest jobs... now part of it I don't get. He drives the Zamboni machine at the local ice rinks.. For some reason this gets an interesting reaction. Almost everyone says oh cool... I had to think abou this. I mean he drives around in circles for 10 minutes of every hour. What is it about the Zamboni that so fascinates us?

Could it be the constant renewal? The way just a simple pass over the ice makes things smooth again? Do we feel something inside? Does something click? I don't know but the reaction is the same everyone loves the idea of the Zamboni driver. That isn't what I got to see him do though. The other part of his job now that is a treat to watch.

Hair Boy is the Mascot for a local hockey team, what I guess we could term a farm team (does hockey have farm teams?). This child of mine has always gotten on well with children. He has a pied piper personality and the little ones adore him... well here he is all dressed up like a giant dog and children flocking around him. It was fun to watch him take the time for high fives and hugs and the occasional picture. It was great to see that he instinctively knew which child needed what attention. This child of mine will someday be a great parent. He will also be a good teacher which is his goal.

I enjoy the occasional glimpses a parent gets to see into their children, seeing what they could become... oh yeah and the hockey game was ok as well.

Facebook Policies

Just a thought for all you parents of teens and preteens or soon to be parents of said group...

Facebook recently revamped their policies to say they basically owned anything you put out there and it was theirs forever. Now this caused a huge uproar and has provoked facebook to reconsider that particular statement. But I have a thought on that. While I wouldn't want facebook to lay claim to my writing as it is mine and they havent paid me, I have to consider another option. Hey don't put something out there that might embarrass you..

Seriously have you SEEN what some people put on their facebook and myspace pages? Parents, take the time to read and monitor your kids pages... I do, much to the chagrin of my children. Having read their stuff pretty regularly now I just go in and do a quick scan and I am out. This is part of my job as a parent, if I don't like what is there, who they are communicating with or what is being said they are done.. the pics, posts and or comments are GONE!!..

By doing this, they tend to not post things that I am not going to like, things I find inappropriate and that leaves little or no room for fear. So Facebook go ahead make your claim, I know for a fact that my kids while, irksome, annoying and obvious pests are not posting things in facebook or myspace that might embarass them later (they do it somewhere else i am sure as they aren't perfect....).